Du or Sie? Formal vs Informal German

German makes a distinction English lost long ago: a separate pronoun and verb form for talking to people formally versus informally. In this lesson, we look at why German has a formal and an informal "you", which pronoun and conjugation to use in each case, and a few real situations that show how to switch between them.

Why Does German Have a Formal "You"?

German distinguishes closeness and social distance through grammar. Du (informal) is for friends, family, children, and people your own age you already know. Sie (formal, always capitalized) is for strangers, most professional settings, older people you've just met, and anyone in a position of authority.

The Conjugation Difference

Du takes the -st ending (Du kommst), while Sie is conjugated exactly like the plural sie (they) — the -en ending (Sie kommen). This means once you know a verb's sie/they form, you automatically know its Sie (formal you) form too.

When Do You Switch from Sie to Du?

Moving from Sie to du is a real, sometimes deliberate step in German-speaking culture — colleagues who work together for a while, or a slightly older person, may formally suggest it ("Wollen wir du sagen?"). When in doubt, starting with Sie and letting the other person offer du first is always the safer choice.

Frequently Asked Questions

When should you use "du" in German?

With friends, family, children, and people your own age or social circle who you already know.

When should you use "Sie" in German?

With strangers, in most professional and formal settings, and with people you've just met, especially if they're older or in a position of authority.

How is "Sie" conjugated compared to "du"?

Sie takes the same -en ending as the plural sie (they), while du takes the -st ending — so Sie kommen but du kommst.

Can you switch from "Sie" to "du" with someone?

Yes, this is a recognized step in German-speaking culture, sometimes suggested explicitly ("Wollen wir du sagen?"), and it's safest to let the other person offer it first.

Is "Sie" always capitalized?

Yes — the formal Sie is always written with a capital S, which distinguishes it in writing from the lowercase sie meaning "she" or "they".

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